What Becomes of the Broken Hearted?

Often we think of Ignatia as the go to ‘grief’ remedy – and it certainly is a great one, but it is only one amongst many remedies (123 in my current book) to really help heal a broken heart, and if we want to see real healing we do need to select the correct remedy.

I’d like to clarify first that we all experience heartbreak in our lives and being heartbroken is not pathology.  In fact, if we went through an awful trauma and weren’t heartbroken that would be more strange!   When we do go through these awful times though, the correct remedy can not only ease the pain at the time, but also help us heal in a timely manner. Time does heal – but not in all cases and we’ve probably all met someone who is still really suffering because of something that happened years ago.

Another way homeopathy can help after a grief is because often we can trace physical problems we now experience back to their beginning, which was shortly after the heartbreak, and often, people who feel they dealt with that difficult time well and have come out the other side, now suffer with physical problems because of it.   I’m surprised by how often people haven’t realised this link until I ask them about when their problem started, and then they make the link that it started a little while after the death of a loved one, a divorce or other heartbreaking trauma.  This is what we, as homeopaths term, ‘ailments after grief’ and I see it a lot.

How Do I know if Ignatia is the one?

Someone needing Ignatia is shocked, they feel let down and betrayed.  There is a lot of deep sighing (an attempt to stop the emotion) and crying, they talk of disappointment, and try to keep their feelings under control, but they still spill out a lot.  They often feel overwhelmed and have strong emotions, maybe even anger about their situation and they can get affected by things at the drop of a hat, which can make them seem unpredictable.  Ignatia is quite a gentle, feminine state to be in, they have a desire to please others and equally have high expectations of others, making disappointment a part of their every day experience.

What are Some of My Other Choices?

A grief remedy I love is Cygnus-Cygnus, a remedy made from the Whooper Swan.  Here we see more of an enduring grief, not necessarily a romantic grief.  They can be very sensitive, spiritual and sentimental but they ‘just get on with it’.  Perhaps, unless you spoke to them about it you wouldn’t realise the deep grief within.  There can be a lot of crying, or an inability to cry, and often there is a real feeling of heaviness.  I’d also look to see more animal issues of survival, injustice etc. than with Ignatia which is a gentle little plant, affected by its surroundings.  Also, the Swan is a bird with its unique feature of a long neck, so we could see bird issues of flying, feeling trapped, or issues with their neck or throat.

Here are some of the lovely statements made by some of my patients where grief was an issue which helped me understand Cygnus-cygnus would be a better choice than Ignatia:

  • I’d listen to her whimper all night, it was heart breaking. I’d grieve for the whole world in those night hours.
  • I like to keep up with the news; I feel it in my heart more than my head.
  • I think it’s the grief of my life that’s caused all my health issues
  • If I could let go… everything’s in my throat
  • I hate injustice, people are let down by the government, I get so angry, seeing horrendous crimes, I grieve for the people
  • I don’t want these problems, I want to fly, I want to fly.
  • I blame the doctors that things have got this bad (Ignatia would be more likely to express disappointment than blame)
  • My mother died, my dog died and then my little bird died. That was just the last straw.

Hura is the number one remedy for the death of a child and bearing that in mind you can imagine how deep this grief is.  There is total hopelessness, they feel totally alone, very vulnerable, unfortunate and a bit of an outcast.  It is also used to treat the feeling of being unwanted or abandoned by loved ones, where you feel that you just don’t fit.  That feeling in of not fitting in is central to this remedy and it is easy to see why the death of a child or any grief you feel that deeply will bring that feeling about.

  • I was an outcast as a child, no one would play with me
  • I tried to commit suicide. I felt that everyone that lived near me was cursed, they had to live with someone who couldn’t make it.

If you, or anyone you know are still suffering after a grief, get in touch with me on 07725 520476 to see how homeopathy can help you.